Peacock just announced its all-star cast for the upcoming third season of The Traitors. Okay, by ‘all-star’ we mean people who are on a lot of reality TV shows because going on series like this is a full-time job for real housewives, survivors, and the loyal subjects to the house of Vanderpump. The latest team to sign up for Alan Cumming’s Shakespearean LARP version of Cluedo includes Bob the Drag queen, Zac Efron’s brother, four real housewives (including Dorinda Medley), and Britney Spears’ ex-husband Sam Asghari.
Perhaps the least well-known name in the ensemble is one Lord Ivar Mountbatten, listed as a ‘British Royal’ in Peacock’s press release. Being more obscure than a Survivor contestant is certainly an achievement of some kind. Since the last season included John Bercow, the former Speaker of the Houses of Parliament in the UK (a move that continues to baffle those of us on this side of the pond), NBC has now opened the door to further Brits. Sure, why not?
So, who is Lord Ivar Mountbatten? No, he’s not a big deal in the UK either.
Lord Ivar Alexander Michael Mountbatten is a British aristocrat who is a second cousin of King Charles III and member of the Mountbatten family. That’s the dynasty that included Prince Philip, former Duke of Edinburgh, and a ton of European royals. They married into all the major posh families across the continent. Many of the current British royals go by the name ‘Mountbatten-Windsor’ when they’re trying to keep it casual.
Ivar had a typically upper-class upbringing, attending Gordonstoun School, a very posh private school in Scotland, before attending university in Vermont. He studied geology and was the director of SCL Group, the parent company of Cambridge Analytica. That’s the political consulting firm that got caught up in a major data scandal with Facebook after it was revealed that they using our personal data to screw around with democracy. Charming.
Ivar’s mostly known for being the first vaguely royal person in Britain to have a same-sex marriage. After about 25 years with his wife, another British aristocrat with whom he had three daughters, he began a relationship with James Coyle, an airline cabin services director from Scotland. His ex was cool with it all and even walked him down the aisle. Ivar and James now run his family estate, Bridwell Park, which you can hire for weddings and functions. Also, they have puppies.
Also, his grandmother was a lesbian who shagged the original Gloria Vanderbilt (Anderson Cooper’s grandmother.) So, there’s that.
So, no, Ivar is not a British royal. He’s an aristocrat and upper-class member of the nobility who has ties to the monarchy (his kids have royal godparents, for example, but not any of the interesting ones), which I imagine is the same thing for many Americans. There are probably a ton of media opportunities for vaguely posh people with more than one surname and an obsolete title, and it’s far more dignified to do The Traitors than munch on kangaroo anus for I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!
Will he be any good at this game? He’s not a public figure about whom we really know anything, unlike Bercow, so who knows? That’s not to say he’s a stranger to reality TV. In 2022, he starred in the ITV series Keeping Up with the Aristocrats, which the Guardian described as being ‘as ludicrous as a real-life Downton Abbey.’ To quote their review, ‘To watch Lord Mountbatten and his husband James stress about finding enough tablecloth underlays to equip the one-night-only, £165-a-head pop-up restaurant they have hired Jean-Christophe Novelli to preside over is to know 27 types of catharsis at once, followed by a deep, deep peace.’
The American version of The Traitors is far more about the ginned-up spectacle of reality TV pros playing their parts for an audience who knows what to expect. The British version, by contrast, is populated with normal people who are cozy and sweet and not very good at faking drama (which makes all the drama that does unfold organically all the more interesting, in my opinion.)
If nothing else, I expect the real housewives to have a ball shading this man into the sun.
A release date for the third season of The Traitors has yet to be announced.
